In retrospect, it was only a matter of time before teams gave up trying to get legitimate wins against the U21 team and resorted to dirty tactics. It wasn't a pretty game on a number of levels. First off, 2 minutes in Venezuelan PF Aurelio Vallenilla hacked US SF Donnel Nichols right out of the game. Four minutes later SF Fabián Miquiero got his flagrant on against SG Jon Yi. At that rate, team USA would be down to Lucky Fans by halftime...or worse, Anderson Adams.
Thankfully, it never got
that dire. For the halftime show it was announced that instead of the Juárez Cartel acrobats the cheerleaders would be dressing up as NT coach Jason in homage to the National Team. Huh? They didn't actually do a show, but the question remained...was this an ill-conceived attempt at rehabilitating Jason's image? Was the no-show some kinda meta-commentary on his leadership qualities this season? As much as I was curious, I was mostly relieved at not seeing a mask of Jason's face attached to a nice rack. The thought of it left me...confused.
Being satisfied with knocking out two starters, or at least not wanting to look
too suspicious, the Venezuelans stopped hacking for the remainder of the game. But the damage was done...they were down by only 4 points with 2 minutes left and an upset was entirely in the cards. However, team USA went on a 13-3 run for the win
(17930). I caught up with an outsized mass of humanity after the game:
fewmit: That was a pretty rough foul on Nichols to start the game. Care to share your love of thuggery with the world?
Vallenilla: Garumph.
fewmit: Coming from a nation made up of millions of short people, you're suspiciously 7'2". Are the rumors of a Venezualan athletic breeding program true?
Vallenilla: Gwa?
fewmit: Story is that, while creating tall athletes that can compete internationally, there have been drawbacks in the areas of mental function and social ability.
Vallenilla: Harnk!
fewmit: Whoa, no need to get snotty! Jeez, keep your pants on. Seriously, pull those up.
Being an infinitely fair journalist I got the other side of the story:
fewmit: A dislocated shoulder? That's it?
Nichols: Giant blur...stars...pain....
fewmit: You do know you have a whole other shoulder to heave the ball with. Why didn't you go back in?
Nichols: Coach said...sit...
fewmit: Well, OK. Of course you should follow the coach's directions. Pussy.
Well, maybe we can blame the coach a little. Here's what he said that was printable:
fewmit: Did you know that surplus U21 uniforms are not considered legal tender in Mexico? What the hell craptastic materials are these made from?
magiker: Waaait...that's what's been happening to the equipment? I had to play Withers for 46 minutes straight tonight because his backup couldn't find his jersey!
fewmit: Don't go blaming your poor game substitutions on me! I'm not the guy who almost lost tonight because of an inability to dope up his players and shove them back on to the court.
He said some colorful stuff after that, but since it's my dispatch I can pretend I had the last word. Next Monday, U21 plays the home team of Mexico. Over/under on game injuries is currently 3.5.