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Happy Ourer: “I’m here with first year assistant coach and former broadcast colleague Air Allnite. Air, nice to see you again. How are things as a coach?”

Air Allnite: “Hello Happy. Good to see you. Things haven’t changed that much; I still don’t like Marshall, you’re still the media shill for the team, and Pio is still a mediocre at best coach.”

HO: “I see you’re still a rat bastard, but I digress. Tell us about your duties with the team.”

AA: “I’ve been assigned to work with the guards, and am also the de facto shooting coach. One of the things I am responsible for is working with the team to lower turnovers.”

HO: “There’s been a lot of change in the backcourt this season. How are the guards adjusting to you?”

AA: “Cerri is terrible shooting and with turnovers. Farley is terrible shooting. Knowles has a turnover problem. Petriukstis can’t shoot his way out of a wet paper bag, but he’s okay with the ball. Tovar can’t shoot as well as he thinks he can, but we’ll get him there. He’s also not bad with the basketball.”

HO: “How are the rest of the players with turnovers?”

AA: “Cut the crap, Happy. You know the numbers. Sokmen wasn’t great, Reynolds needs a lot of work. All the bigs need work, Donny needs court time so we can see, and so does McCain, but again, you knew that. Frickin’ stupid question. Why do you ask questions you already know the answer to?

HO: “Who’s benefiting most from you help with shooting?”

AA: “I’d say Sokmen before his recent departure. I’m looking to see who picks up where he left off.”

HO: “A point of emphasis has been to get the team to play faster, and also have the guards attck inside more. How’s that going?”

AA: “It’s up and down. Cerri is really good at attacking the rim and finishing; if we can add range to his shot, he’ll be very dangerous. The drive and dish will be killer for him. Farley is a different animal but he’s really good at driving. He’s a better shooter than Cerri but doesn’t finish as well in the paint. McCain and Donny we’re still trying to find out about. Knowles does what he does. I wish he’d work on finishing better, but he can definitely shoot. If Tovar could finish, he might be something. He can drive. Then there’s Petriukstis… I don’t know what to say about him that hasn’t already been said. He’s a capable penetrator but he can’t finish. If we can figure out how to light his fire on offense, he’ll be a monster.”

HO: “Is there a shooter you want to work more with that is not a guard?”

AA: “Every time I ask for Pemwieser, he’s off doing drills with the other bigs. Give me time with him and he becomes a huge weapon. Give me Hatfield, and I’ll make his offense playable at 3 positions.”

HO: Well, that’s all the time we have, Air. Thank you for your time. I’m sure the fans would love to hear more from you!”

AA: “The pleasure was all yours. I’m just trying to do you a solid and help boost your ratings.”

HO: “Folks, that was Air Allnite, first year assistant coach with your Linndale basketball team and the world’s biggest butthead. The only reason he’s not divorced is because he couldn’t pay anyone to marry him first; a bride or a judge. We’ll be back after the break!”

Day 15 (Tuesday 17 October 2023) : Performances by (https://www.buzzer-manager.com)
Edited to add: A bit rough watching a tight game get blown out by fouls/free throws at the end. Nice win Tasty!

Night results
Las Vegas High Rollers 103 - Fort Wayne Pistons 113
209’s MostWanted 112 - Miami Cleo 35
Philly Dribble 105 - Super Sonics 123
Linndale 114 - Twotone Touloose 77
Lion Rebels 130 - Tasty Tardsicles 137
San Dominica Warriors 103 - VileOnes 114
F.Day Internet Lovers Club 77 - Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️ 80
southpaw army 125 - Żubr Białystok 35

Best collective performance of the evening
Points : 137 : Tasty Tardsicles
Rebounds : 72 : 209’s MostWanted
Assists : 43 : southpaw army
Steals : 15 : Linndale, southpaw army
Block Shots : 15 : 209’s MostWanted

Personal best performances of the evening
Points : 37 : K. Brown (Lion Rebels)
Rebounds : 19 : J. Smug (209’s MostWanted)
Assists : 13 : C. Wui Kwong (Tasty Tardsicles)
Steals : 5 : D. Hatfield (Linndale)
Block Shots : 4 : U. Jaén (Fort Wayne Pistons), M. Coedo (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️), D. Branimirović (F.Day Internet Lovers Club)

Top 5 of the evening
Point Guard : C. Wui Kwong (Tasty Tardsicles) (15 Points, 8 Rebounds, 13 Assists, 2 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 33
Shooting Guard : S. Aranda (Fort Wayne Pistons) (24 Points, 1 Rebounds, 4 Assists, 1 Steals, 1 Block Shots), N. de Moraes (southpaw army) (18 Points, 0 Rebounds, 6 Assists, 4 Steals, 2 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 24
Small Forward : P. Cuellar (209’s MostWanted) (22 Points, 7 Rebounds, 4 Assists, 0 Steals, 2 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 29
Power Forward : J. Smug (209’s MostWanted) (18 Points, 19 Rebounds, 2 Assists, 1 Steals, 2 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 37
Center : C. Goldsmith (Super Sonics) (18 Points, 14 Rebounds, 1 Assists, 0 Steals, 0 Block Shots), J. García de la Vega (VileOnes) (9 Points, 16 Rebounds, 8 Assists, 1 Steals, 1 Block Shots), S. Kunyan (southpaw army) (16 Points, 11 Rebounds, 3 Assists, 1 Steals, 1 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 31

MVP of the evening
J. Smug (209’s MostWanted) (18 Points, 19 Rebounds, 2 Assists, 1 Steals, 2 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 37

The bad performance of the evening
K. Gendron (Miami Cleo) (4 Points, 3 Rebounds, 1 Assists, 3 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : -11

All kinds of statistics
The player who forgot to remove his mittens : K. Kilijan (Twotone Touloose) : 8 Turnovers

Player targeted by the referees : A. Nikitinas (Tasty Tardsicles), R. Sedonio (Lion Rebels) : 6 Personnal Fouls

The iron-man : R. Sedonio (Lion Rebels), T. Freeman (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️), M. Blanco (F.Day Internet Lovers Club), W. Acevedo (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️), W. Bonner (Żubr Białystok) : 48 Minutes

The shooter : S. Rigaux (Philly Dribble), K. Brown (Lion Rebels) : 6 Three points

The best performer : N. de Moraes (southpaw army) : Rating : 18.0

The worst performer : P. Rivard (Miami Cleo) : Rating : 0.5



Last edited by Baine at 10/18/2023 10:18:45 AM

Thanks, I didn't know saving up money is a way to shoot up the league. Not sure that will help with long term or what will happen if he didn't win this div. I guess he had enough money to try it for few seasons.

I am First in B3 Predictions. I don't think I will be there for long lol

Air Allnite stormed into Pio Reina’s office. “What the hell do you think you’re doing getting rid of my best guard?” Air was livid. You could literally see steam coming off his head. For his part, Pio Reina was nonplussed.

“Maybe you were born in a barn or something, but where I come from when doors are closed we knock. Also, if you ever come at me like that again, you’ll need the medical staff to patch you up before you can collect your belongings and be escorted off the premises. Security in that case would be here for your protection, not mine. Do I make myself clear?”

Air thought hard. If he wanted to take Pio’s job, that wouldn’t happen were he to be fired as an assistant.

“Crystal clear.”

“Let’s try that again now, shall we? You have something to say, Air?”

“Why did you get rid of my best guard?”

Pio stood up. “Contrary to what you think, the head coach in this shop does not have personnel power. The head coach works with the GM. The GM has the final call. You wanna complain? Go see Roberto. Also, do yourself a favor and pull your head out of your ass; if you had been paying attention you’d know that we’ve been shopping Kyle all season. Your primary responsibility was to work with the guards. If you’ve done your job well, you should have no concerns. Are you confident in the remaining guys? I am.”

That just pissed Air off even more. “My guys are ready! I’ve done my job and done it well! That’s no excuse to get rid of my best player!”

Pio replied, “your best player? First, I’m the head coach. Second, and I already told you once, you got a problem, go see Roberto. His office is across the hall. I’ve said all I’m going to say about that. Now do you have any thoughts on what we do moving forward with the guard rotation? If not, you are dismissed.”

Air stood up. “I’ll be back to discuss that with you. I need a few moments.”

Day 16 (Saturday 21 October 2023) : Performances by (https://www.buzzer-manager.com)

Night results
Las Vegas High Rollers 97 - Lion Rebels 117
209’s MostWanted 84 - San Dominica Warriors 117
Philly Dribble 76 - F.Day Internet Lovers Club 118
Linndale 64 - southpaw army 101
Miami Cleo 36 - VileOnes 155
Super Sonics 103 - Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️ 117
Twotone Touloose 133 - Żubr Białystok 58
Tasty Tardsicles 120 - Fort Wayne Pistons 101

Best collective performance of the evening
Points : 155 : VileOnes
Rebounds : 78 : VileOnes
Assists : 50 : VileOnes
Steals : 11 : Linndale, Twotone Touloose
Block Shots : 14 : VileOnes

Personal best performances of the evening
Points : 42 : L. Zotke (Las Vegas High Rollers)
Rebounds : 21 : I. Tabrizi (F.Day Internet Lovers Club), J. García de la Vega (VileOnes)
Assists : 11 : L. Miller (VileOnes)
Steals : 4 : T. Rumin (209’s MostWanted), P. Farley (Linndale), G. Kirilovs (Twotone Touloose)
Block Shots : 5 : K. Ramazan (VileOnes)

Top 5 of the evening
Point Guard : L. Zotke (Las Vegas High Rollers) (42 Points, 2 Rebounds, 8 Assists, 0 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 42
Shooting Guard : N. Breeden (VileOnes) (25 Points, 4 Rebounds, 5 Assists, 1 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 31
Small Forward : U. Jaén (Fort Wayne Pistons) (38 Points, 5 Rebounds, 5 Assists, 1 Steals, 3 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 42
Power Forward : I. Tabrizi (F.Day Internet Lovers Club) (33 Points, 21 Rebounds, 0 Assists, 2 Steals, 4 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 51
Center : J. García de la Vega (VileOnes) (11 Points, 21 Rebounds, 6 Assists, 0 Steals, 2 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 34

MVP of the evening
I. Tabrizi (F.Day Internet Lovers Club) (33 Points, 21 Rebounds, 0 Assists, 2 Steals, 4 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 51

The bad performance of the evening
H. Stubbs (Miami Cleo) (0 Points, 3 Rebounds, 1 Assists, 0 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : -15

All kinds of statistics
The player who forgot to remove his mittens : P. Rivard (Miami Cleo) : 5 Turnovers

Player targeted by the referees : D. Conaghan (Tasty Tardsicles) : 6 Personnal Fouls

The iron-man : I. Tabrizi (F.Day Internet Lovers Club), L. Melucci (F.Day Internet Lovers Club), T. Freeman (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️), W. Acevedo (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️), W. Bonner (Żubr Białystok) : 48 Minutes

The shooter : L. Zotke (Las Vegas High Rollers), M. Swenson (Żubr Białystok) : 7 Three points

The best performer : K. Knowles (Linndale), N. de Moraes (southpaw army) : Rating : 18.5

The worst performer : P. Rivard (Miami Cleo) : Rating : 1.0

Day 17 (Tuesday 24 October 2023) : Performances by (https://www.buzzer-manager.com)

Night results
San Dominica Warriors 115 - Las Vegas High Rollers 94
F.Day Internet Lovers Club 86 - 209’s MostWanted 65
southpaw army 109 - Philly Dribble 73
Lion Rebels 115 - Linndale 94
Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️ 129 - Miami Cleo 32
Żubr Białystok 17 - Super Sonics 140
Fort Wayne Pistons 119 - Twotone Touloose 105
VileOnes 110 - Tasty Tardsicles 113

Best collective performance of the evening
Points : 140 : Super Sonics
Rebounds : 80 : Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️
Assists : 42 : Super Sonics
Steals : 20 : Super Sonics
Block Shots : 19 : Super Sonics

Personal best performances of the evening
Points : 40 : A. Messineo (VileOnes)
Rebounds : 33 : K. Zerdev (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️)
Assists : 15 : G. Izaza (Fort Wayne Pistons)
Steals : 4 : A. Guilla (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️), D. Boyce (Super Sonics)
Block Shots : 5 : D. Branimirović (F.Day Internet Lovers Club), M. Watkins (Lion Rebels), K. Zerdev (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️), M. Davies (Super Sonics), J. García de la Vega (VileOnes)

Top 5 of the evening
Point Guard : T. Hearn (Super Sonics) (25 Points, 4 Rebounds, 8 Assists, 2 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 36
Shooting Guard : W. Acevedo (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️) (28 Points, 5 Rebounds, 6 Assists, 3 Steals, 4 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 31
Small Forward : U. Jaén (Fort Wayne Pistons) (38 Points, 12 Rebounds, 7 Assists, 0 Steals, 1 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 47
Power Forward : K. Zerdev (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️) (24 Points, 33 Rebounds, 6 Assists, 1 Steals, 5 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 57
Center : I. Tabrizi (F.Day Internet Lovers Club) (32 Points, 13 Rebounds, 2 Assists, 0 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 35

MVP of the evening
K. Zerdev (Mindless Zombies 🧟‍♀️) (24 Points, 33 Rebounds, 6 Assists, 1 Steals, 5 Block Shots) : Efficiency : 57

The bad performance of the evening
W. Bonner (Żubr Białystok) (5 Points, 3 Rebounds, 0 Assists, 2 Steals, 0 Block Shots) : Efficiency : -12

All kinds of statistics
The player who forgot to remove his mittens : M. Swenson (Żubr Białystok), H. Gandy (Żubr Białystok) : 7 Turnovers

Player targeted by the referees : F. Kang (southpaw army) : 6 Personnal Fouls

The iron-man : J. Bover (VileOnes) : 53 Minutes

The shooter : A. Reese (Twotone Touloose), A. Messineo (VileOnes) : 7 Three points

The best performer : C. Goldsmith (Super Sonics) : Rating : 18.0

The worst performer : P. Rivard (Miami Cleo) : Rating : 0.5

33 boards for your boy Zerdev - only 6 off the record!

I wasn't expecting that kind of performance lol

Brian:

I’m Brian Sanborn, here with Warrior 1 himself Coach Stephenson. Coach, your squad came out on top against Las Vegas a few days ago.

Coach:

Yeah, a much needed win. Right now we’re in that last stretch of the season where every win is a needed win. Especially given our place in the standings in the Big 8.

Brian:

A game that was a bit surprising in that Vegas got a strong start in the first quarter.

Coach:

Not really that big of a surprise. I know some people want to say that we were overlooking Vegas that we were looking ahead to Linndale. We weren’t. This is a serious team, a talented team. And as you any given day …

Brian:

Speaking of Linndale. They come into the SMG tomorrow. Lots of history between these two teams. Usually at this time of the season, the San Dominica – Linndale matchup usually has huge stakes. Does it feel different this season?

Coach:

Oh Hell no! I know a lot of people are saying that this Linndale squad is not the same as the squads we’ve seen the past four seasons. They’re rebuilding. Mass mayhem in the Speedway this season. Look as you said, this is a rivalry game. Sure their record is probably the inverse of what it would have been the past few seasons but in these type of games that means nothing. Absolutely nothing. Right now Pio Reina has a foe in front of him and he’s gonna do everything he can and use every possible trick to beat that foe. Just happens tomorrow that foe is me!

Now it is going to be weird not seeing some guys, but I mean that’s just the nature of the game, the sport, hell change is the only constant in the universe. But nah no huge difference in how we’re treating this. There’s been times when the situation was reversed, they were the team in the driver’s seat regarding the playoffs and we were the squirrels trying to catch a nut. And still Pio gave us mad respect still because he understands what it is when our two teams meet up. Right now we’re tying to get to 12 wins. I think with 12 we’re in.

Hmm, I’m expecting a high pace uptempo game. That style we both like to play. I don’t know if there’s going to be a Stretch 4 or 5 factor as there’s been in the past. Now if I was smart I’d prep for a slower pace game since I think right now that would probably be the best tactic for them to get the win with the squad they currently have. But what’s the fun in that.

Brian:

Speaking of your own team and changeups. Ali Baba getting the start at the point spot.

Coach:

Yeah Alidori, he’s improved so much on the defensive end and as a passer. He’s finally become that point guard who could run that old Paul Westhead Loyola Marymount offense if we had to run it.

Brian:

Tell us you’re old without telling us you’re old. We’re be back after this commercial break. This is the Coach Stephenson Show.

Last edited by Coach Stephenson at 10/28/2023 12:37:15 PM

At the post game press conference…

“You guys know I have a lot of respect for Coach Stephenson and that team in the other locker room. It’s been a hard year, but this is San Dominica. I hate to say it, but they kicked the absolute crap out of us. I always say kick us while we’re down, because when we get up, it’s our turn to do the kicking. They did that tonight. We battled on the boards, we took relatively good care of the ball for us; I’m not happy with it but that’s just who this team is right now. What I can’t get with is the lack of steals and blocks; those are hustle plays and we can’t let the other team out hustle us. What I refuse to accept, no matter how undermanned people think our roster is, is a lack of defensive effort. We played a 3-2 zone specifically to stop the outside shooting and we got killed outside. I’m gonna need an explanation as to why that’s not a lack of effort on defense. Yes, San Dominica had great ball movement on offense, but a 3-2 defense should never give up 52% shooting from the outside on 27 attempts. We put our best perimeter defender on LAB as we usually do because he always plays well against us. Tonight he just carved us up. This is the kind of game that leaves a bad taste in your mouth not just for the season, but into next year as well. This game was not competitive. I am embarrassed for our fans and San Dominica’s fans. Win or lose, they know they’re gonna get a good game and have a good time. Tonight’s game was not a good game.”

“Coach, Jimmy Buckitts with Swish Magazine. What do you need to do to fix this going into next season? What do you need and is that need currently on the roster?”

“I’ll need to take my lieutenants and we need to get back in the lab. Some of what we need is here. Maybe all of it; maybe not. We know our front office will get us what we need. The beating we took from San Dominica tonight cannot happen again. That was just unacceptable. I tip my cap to Coach Stephenson, but this kind of beating can never happen again. The effort our team gave was unacceptable.”

Meanwhile, in the locker room, with Byron Helm...

“You guys have consistently shown you can’t play at pace. Some of you are not ready to be who we thought you were. Josh, you are exactly who we thought you were. Koncki, we have a couple things to clean up, but you are also who we thought you were. Shooter, you looked like a pretty good combo guard out there. We need more from you, and at both ends. Cerri, you looked like a point guard giving a game effort at small forward. You know what we want from you; do that and you’ll be murder on the floor. Pemweiser, your passing has to improve, and you need to be more aggressive shooting. Next season is going to be huge for your development. Show us you can be the weapon we think you are. Hatfield, we’re going to work on your offense a lot more. I think some time on the perimeter will benefit you. Your size and ball handling work to your advantage. We’ll get your shot working. You’re playing small forward. The rest of you guys need to do some soul searching and figure who you are, who you want to be, and how you get there. Right now I’m telling you we 11 guys on this team and ya’ll played like we’re only 6 deep. Change our minds or we change the roster.”

Last edited by Speedtraps at 10/28/2023 10:53:21 PM