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Gaudioso Dabandan was found sipping vodka in the practice court of his new team in Ukraine. Reporters quickly pounced on him for an ambush interview regarding the word war between his former employer Jsmoove of Celestial Wrath and Huck Finn of Red Horse Beermen.

"You want me to comment on that stone cold heartless former employer of mine Jsmoove?" laughed Dabandan. "That SOB is piece of work. He has no loyalty whatsoever to his players even those who have helped him win all those cups and trophies and has made him the most successful team owner in the Philippines."

"When Abada was sold many seasons ago I already knew I would be discarded when the time comes Jsmoove would have no use of me anymore. Basketball is a business I get it but sometimes as an owner you also have to value your players especially homegrown ones who can give you multiple championships even when we are in our mid 30's. Abada and I would have given him multiple championships if that SOB didn't break up our tandem just because Abada was getting old and he wouldn't have gotten anything of value from him anymore."

"But that is just the nature of SOB Jsmoove. To him everything is just a commodity for him to win. It is what makes him successful as many people say. I just hope karma will bite him in seasons to come. By then I'll my laughing my butt of his misfortune."

"As for that rash young upstart Huck Finn, his player Dispo maybe the next coming of me and Abada he still have many bowls of rice to consume before he can even be mentioned in the league of two of the best SF in the Philippines ever. Wait your time Mr. Huck Finn coz Fate and Destiny has a funny way of educating swollen heads like you. And if Dispo wants a one on one match I'm game anytime. Let's see who is the "Useless Junk" as he aptly called me. Loser much."

"And oh I forgot to mention. His player Dispo isn't the kind of player to pass the ball. Another hero complex kind of player in the Pilipinas National Team. Good riddance I'm not part of that team anymore. I think I'll be banging my head every time I see the "Buwayas" force their shots." Dabandan ended the ambush interview with a tongue sticking out.

Last edited by Lolo Smithz at 4/19/2013 12:11:15 AM

this whole story is getting worth it! xD seems to be a best selling novel for me now! xD

Feels like WWE now. May backstory / drama before the fight. Tsaka may good and bad daw kuno.

Basketball ba ito or wrestling? :P

Parang akong nagbabasa ng manga o kaya nanonood ng ina,kapatid,anak. Can't wait for the next episode.

Kelan lalabas bagong episode? hahaha

All-star break is fast approaching and Coach Huck Finn was busy preparing and planning his grand vacation get away when his pet dog accidentally tuned his LG 84LM9600 Television Set to the Celestial Channel. Coach Huck Finn paused for a moment, sat beside his pet and listened carefully. The next day, he was listening to Papa Jack when the program was interrupted by a breaking news, turned out to be a quick interview of the allegedly soon to be a Celestial "Hall of Famer" Gaudioso Dabandan. Coach Huck Finn was very upset that he phoned yours truly, SexyCandy Demata - your favorite Sagad™ Gazette, for another cup of tea.

The team was currently having their practice when yours truly arrived at the Red Horse Arena. Coach Huck Finn invited me to his office upon my arrival. He offered a cup tea and after few minutes of conversation, he finally got to the point, "I would like to emphasize this to the manager claiming that he have won many cup and PPL trophies. I may have no cup or PPL trophies to show off at the moment but be prepared when we get there. Enjoy your reign while it lasts." Coach Huck Finn grinned then led me into the hard court where I got the chance to interview Johnas Dispo.

"I'd rather rot in League III in a team that value their home grown talents rather than in a strong team that carelessly throw away players occasionally. I will do whatever it takes to bring my team to the PPL irregardless of my age. When the time comes we meet Celestial Wrath, let see whose bench wants to be in what bench." said Dispo. "Regarding Dabandan, I guess he can't get enough sleep because his "beloved team" dropped him off. I'd love to play one on one against him to settle our score once and for all." he ended.

Both Coach Huck Finn and Team aptain Johnas Dispo gave brief statements as they are busy practicing for their next game against the Ninuno Gods.


SexyCandy Demata
Sagad™ Gazette

Meanwhile in the National Team office, Coach PH-cezzz is having a hard time figuring what to do next versus Iran. The Game Shape of his player are really very low right now especially Mr. Fantastico Abada who played 53 minutes during his last game. PH-cezzz suddenly called a press conference to announce a very important move in his coaching career.

"Yeah he improved in his skill but I think his age really affects his Game Shape right now. So, I would like to announce that the Philippine National Team recruits Gaudioso "Seryoso" Dabandan to be Mr. Abada's replacement in the next game." The room suddenly silenced for a while and the reporters suddenly asked flurry of questions. "Silence please, I told every Filipino fans that there is still an available spot in this team right? I feel sorry for JSMoove that he sold Dabandan before I recruited him. Nothing personal, I eventually watched the league performance of Querouz and Dabandan and the latter "won" the spot for me."

"I am excited to see Dabandan and Dispo play together. I hope those two will be close friends. Thank you and you may now all leave." - PH-cezzz closed.

Last edited by PH-cezzz at 4/19/2013 10:54:33 PM

The Holster Feature: Quotable quotes of the week

This week saw an exchange of heated words between teams in Pilipinas BuzzerBeater, who have their top players involved in a fiasco as well as failed deals. The following exchanges from press releases have been ranked according to their degree of "BURN!". Prepare your ointments as this is going to be extremely hot.

10) "He will probably be in his late 30's if his current team reaches the PPL, and that's a big if. Meanwhile, we would have won more Cup and PPL trophies as his team has won division championships." - JSmoove (through a press secretary)

In describing the potential achievements of Johnas Dispo, franchise player of Red Horse Beermen, JSmoove, manager of Celestial Wrath did not hesitate to display his intention to acquire the budding superstar, and this quote looked like a sales pitch that projected the possibility of him reaching the PPL in the later years of his career if he stays with his team.

9) "we will dominate Dispo so much that he would wish that he's part of our bench at the end of the game." - JSmoove (through a press secretary)

This quote came from the same press release as #10. This time, press asked if JSmoove were afraid of Red Horse Beermen if they met in the future. An even hotter quote is to be uttered regarding the matter in the succeeding ranks.

8) "As for Huck Finn, he's just known as Dispo's owner, nothing more." - JSmoove (through a press secretary)

Although a condescending statement by nature, it re-established the gap between the two parties. An old school burn indeed.

7) "But that is just the nature of SOB Jsmoove. To him everything is just a commodity for him to win." - Gaudioso Dabandan

An obviously frustrated Dabandan dropped a pipebomb on his former manager about the situation he was in before his departure. In this statement, he alleges his manager's tendency to look at his players as commodity and selling them when they are still at prime to get the most value out of them.

6) "His current manager has been stubborn about the matter. We inquired about him and the manager wanted 8 million for him. He deserves to be in a mental institution." - JSmoove

Mental Institutions aren't a laughing matter, but that is how JSmoove described Huck Finn in regards to their failed deal to transfer Dispo to the reigning PPL and Cup champs.

5) "As a sign of friendship Lolo Smithz has sent over ten boxes of herbal tea to Huck Finn. It's rumored Mr. Huck Finn drinks too much beer" - Lolo Smithz press release

The statement came after the fact that negotiations between Red Horse Beermen and Lolo Smithz's Zebu Mayas had broken down. The humor in the quote comes from the fact that the Huck Finn's team does represent an alcoholic beverage that is associated with the alleged rumors about him.

4) "He's half the player that I am. I have played in B3 games before he was even out of his diapers" - Gaudioso Dabandan

In a show of pride by the former NT mainstay, Dabandan slams Dispo over the latter's selection to the team.

3) I may not be as good as you are now, but I am trying my best to become just like you if not better than you" - Johnas Dispo

The most discussed player of the moment, Johnas Dispo made this strong statement in a response to Dabandan's #4 statement.

2) As a matter of fact, WE, I and JSmoove, deserved to be in a mental institution, I being his doctor and him being my patient. - Huck Finn

Huck Finn tried to put the joke on JSmoove as the Beermen head responded to the #6 statement. Talk about a counter-strike.

1) "Are they even in the cup?" - JSmoove

If your team is no longer in the Philippine Cup, you'd be burned to death if this was directed at you.

Lines that made me LAUGH throughout the conversations..


#1. Coach Huck Finn called the attention of the Sagad™ Gazette, news branch of the Red Horse Beermen, to air his side on the issue.

Are you sure you want to air your side on SAGAD? hahaha! People Might as well look at the centerfold of the paper than read your statement.. xD (if you know what i mean)



#2. Coach Huck Finn's voice rises as he grab a cup of herbal tea for two from Lolo Smithz.

Coach ka po ng Redhorse Beermen... why would you endorse the herbal tea of Lolo? hahaha.. dapat bad ass.. endorse beer! xD


#3.The opposing SF was toying with him(Dabandan).

Dabandan being a boy toy? xD What's even worst is being a boy toy to another man! xD


#4.Dabandan ended the ambush interview with a tongue sticking out.

After provoking and being mean on an interview.. ilalabas mo nalang ang dila mo? SO GAY! hahaha.. might as well do a dirty FINGER! xD hahahaha

JUST FOR FUN! I REALLY FIND THOSE LINES VERY AWKWARD! xD HAHAHA

Streak-busters..almost! Mavs lose 84-82, LHC maintain perfect season

Q. Arena, Philippines -- Hello! Hello! It's been two months since the Dahlia Mavericks organization released a press release. Currently, the Mavs are at the bottom with a 4-9 record at the unforgiving Big 8.

Last night, the Mavs known for their heart-breaking losses or 'inspired' play against top-tier teams proved why it was worth it to watch a Mavs game.

Boasting an all-Filipino line-up, they were pitted against the then 12-0 Lonely Hearts Club.

The Mavs were leading 46-40 at the half but could not sustain their momentum in the 4th as they found themsevles trailing by as much as 9 points (83-72) with 3:31 left.

As d brothers team owner Iking said "it seems like your team ran out of gas." To which GM Maro replied, "never say die, you'll see how our team is made of!"

The Mavs went on a tear scoring the next 9 points while holding the Hearts scoreless in 3 minutes but injuring back-up point guard Jake Pueda in the process.

"It's that time of the year again when we are decimated by injuries after the all-star break" a season-ticket holder said noting that starting point guard is still recuperating from a two-week injury and Pueda succumbing to his own two-week injury.

With the score tied at 82 apiece with 13 seconds left, Mustafa Ekin found Pierre-Charles Jutras who calmly hits a a jump-shot from the wing. The Mavs called a time-out.

"Ouch!" Iking exclaimed obviously rooting for an upset? by the Mavs. GM Maro said "were used to this, down to the last possession."

On the ensuing possession, the Mavs safely inbounded the ball. They tried their best to find the open man, dribbled, dribbled, all were on their feet, only to be stolen by Francis Nunez.

All were in disbelief as they could not take a shot as almost everyone were rooting for the Mavs to put a stamp on the Hearts perfect season so far.

"We have to give credit when it is due. They played great defense on the last 13 seconds," GM Nicolo Maro said.

National Team player Apolonio Sepulveda led the Mavs with 30 points, 15 rebounds and 3 blocks to prove his worth. Scott Famaran had a double-double with 12 points and 19 rebounds.

"They are proving that they can co-exist playing together. One is finesse while the other will be there down-low," their GM said as some are suggesting to let go of the other and find a 'killer' guard. "we will make it work." Maro assuredly said not a disappointment in his face despite the loss, and the loss of another player to injury.

"We thought we can't pull it off," the over? confident Sgt. Pepper said. "I have extreme confidence with our team." (despite an upset in the Cup).

Francis Nunez and Dean Beverly led the Hearts with 18 points apiece while Mustafa Ekin chipped in 17 points.

Although out-rebounded (52-33) the Hearts put their stamp on defense as the Mavs turned the ball over 22 times doubling their turnover (with 11).

Breaking news:
The Dahlia Mavericks is celebrating as Apolonio Sepulveda and Fillmore Sabangan were voted all-stars.

"Saba" is averaging 20.2ppg, 4.4rpg, 4.4apg in 11 games for the Mavs. "All is sacrificing for our team. They want to play here. Because we take care of our players." GM Nicolo Maro said taking a shot at both feuding Celestial Wrath (known for their wheeling and dealing?) and all-hype? Dispo being supported by his team.

"I would like to thank everyone for supporting me, recognizing what I, we have accomplished as a team." Saba said. He is now a five-time allstar.

"Sepu" a.k.a. "the rock" of the team is averaging 19.4ppg, 13.5rpg, and 2.2bpg for the Mavs this season. It is his second PPL allstar game appearance and a five-time allstar.

Arguably the most coveted Mavs player, he is also recognized as a National Team-worthy player.

"I would like to thank my previous team, Xerex, led by its owner Xerex Boy. If not for him, I wouldn't be who I am today. For giving me the opportunity to ply my skills in the Premier League. And of course, the Mavs organization, for honing my skills. The Q. family for supporting me. The NT recognition is for the fans -- we've made it!" Sepulveda said.

Everyone is excited for the all-star break. "Let's recharge and have fun!" GM Nicolo maro exclaimed.